| |
What’s
Your Parenting Style?
By Janet Penley
Summary: Good
parents come in many styles. There is no one “right” way
to be a good parent. Each of us brings strengths to parenting
that feel as natural as breathing.
The good news is that you no longer have to covet your
neighbor's style. You have your own and your own strengths.
|
|
What’s Your Parenting Style?
Do you know your strengths as a parent? Many organizations
use a framework of personality type developed by Carl Jung
and measured by the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator to identify
the strengths of different management styles. But this framework
is also useful in helping you understand your parenting style.
After more than a decade of research and study, I have come
to understand how personality type influences parenting style,
as well as, these two truths:
• Good
parents come in many styles. There is no one “right” way
to be a good parent. Each of us brings strengths to parenting that
feel as natural as breathing.
• Every parent is a mixed bag. No matter how hard we try, we can’t
erase our humanness. Fortunately, children don’t need perfect parents because,
as human beings, they themselves will never be perfect either.
|
 |
Your parenting style is determined by your preference in each
of these four categories. These preferences combine to form
sixteen different personality types, and that means sixteen
different parenting styles - each with unique gifts.
| Extraverted
parents are out and about, interacting and experiencing.
They help children experience the world. Too much time
at home can make them feel shaky and ungrounded. A
loner child may make them uncomfortable. |
|
Introverted
parents crave solitude and time alone. Observant
and reflective, they know their children as individuals
and provide them with “downtime”. Drained
by too much interaction, they must guard their energy. |
| Sensing
parents focus on specifics, practicalities and
the here and now. Hands-on parents, they tend to children’s
basic needs and do concrete activities with them. They
struggle to join in a child’s imagination and
may get stuck in a rut. |
|
Intuitive
parents focus on the big picture, possibilities,
and patterns. They encourage children’s creativity,
imagination, and point up options. Drained by the nitty-gritty,
they struggle to be realistic, especially about time. |
| Thinking
parents trust logic, objectivity and impersonal
analysis. They let children do for themselves, foster
independence and answer why’s. They struggle
to tune in to and be patient with children’s
irrational feelings. |
|
Feeling
parents rely on values, feelings and personal
information to decide. Attuned to children’s
feelings, they strive to be physically and emotionally
close, but may struggle to say no and be firm if it
may cause conflict. |
| Judging
parents like structure, plans, limits, and order.
They are adept at organizing day-to-day, and aim to
do things the right way. They struggle to adapt to
the unexpected, relax and have fun. |
|
Perceiving
parents go with the flow, and are generally
flexible, spontaneous, tolerant and accepting. Relaxed
about clutter, they struggle to do chores regularly
and keep the house in order |
To learn more or to purchase The M.O.M.S.
Handbook – Understanding Your Personality Type in Mothering,
go to www.momsconnection.com or
847-251-4936.
Janet Penley founder
of Mothers of Many Styles (1998), and co-author of The M.O.M.S.
Handbook, has developed M.O.M.S. from 15 years of research
and interviews with hundreds of mothers. A popular community
lecturer, she has given more than 600 seminars and presentations
nationally on parenting styles and family interactions. Penley,
an MBA and mother of two (a boy, 23 and a girl, 20), can be
reached at 847-251-4936, JPMoms@aol.com, or www.momsconnection.com.
|
|
